I have to sit before I hold my grandson in case I have a seizure. Which leads me to the bad shit.While we were at my daughter’s I felt a seizure trying to start. I didn’t want to spazz in front of her so I tried to meditate in order to get under it and diffuse it before it started. After a while, they thought I had fallen asleep and started talking in front of me. I was wide awake. My wife told her how I cried when she asked me to give up my books. My daughter told her that she’s moving too fast and she needs to give me time to get settled. I’m going “oh fuck! this is me they’re talking about.” After a while they quit talking and decided they needed to “wake me up” as my daughter had some where to go. I got to hold my grandson again while she was getting ready. My wife was playing with our grandaughter in another part of the house. I held him as tears streamed down my face. I realized how much of his life I’m going to miss.I’ve had a trip planned for several months and it looks like. Then if you will now move out into the corridor, I shallcomplete the locking procedure."I gathered my train up and piled it over one arm. Gerda, the younggirls and I then exited the room. There was no sign of Lexi, Hanna, andLeni, who had gone on ahead and would be making their own way down tothe church. While we waited in the corridor outside, Wagner checkedunder the bed, in my closet, and in my bathroom. Satisfied no-one washiding in my quarters, he hung my key on the hook inside the door thenlocked it, handing the master keyring to Gruber when he had done so."That's it, Herr Gruber," he said, "all upper rooms confirmed empty andpersonally locked by me. The only duplicate keys are now in yourpossession and patrolling these floors until the F?hrer's departureyour responsibility."Gruber grunted a response, barely able to hide his disappointment atbeing sidelined like this."Come, ladies," said Wagner, ushering us towards the staircase down tothe entrance hall, "your automobile.
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